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Today is: [ Year 2003 ][ Year 2004 ][ Year 2006 ][ Year 2007 ][ Year 2008 ][ My Research Journal ][ Back to JimFurey.com ] I have no doubt that this will be the last entry of the year. In it, I want to mention the strange effect I've noticed. This year people seemed less "Christmasy". And I know it wasn't just me who noticed, but really most of the people I asked said the same thing. Without really thinking about it, this year was the first in 3 years that I didn't put up decorations at work. In the past 2 years I put garland through the halls and also did up my office. But not this year. It wasn't that I didn't feel like it, or even give it much thought. It simply "just didn't happen". So that's about it for now, I'll "keep you posted".  Well, it's all very interesting the power of the Internet. (For years I resisted using a capital "I" because I never considered it proper to give it one, but now I'm gaining respect.) I was surfing the net, reading news stories and I came upon one that talked about a man named Michael Hanscom. He had worked at MicroSoft's MSCopy print shop as a temp. One day he happened to notice a truck unloading Apple G5s and he took a picture of it and posted it on his site saying "Even MicroSoft needs Apple G5s". (Or something to that effect.) For that he was fired, MS saying that he violated MS's "no camera" rules. Even though the picture was innocuous and didn't give any MS secrets away. In his following blog entry, he happened to mention that he now was concerned about making rent and had to dig into his emergency reserve money. Several people picked up on this and not only did he get interviewed on various news programs (including, ironically MSNBC) but also many private individual like yourself (blog readers) sent him money for rent! In his post "fifteen minutes of fame" he explains that not only was he able to make rent, but had a little left over. Thus, what I've always been saying, you never know the bad or good effect of posting a blog. That's why I'm relatively vague about my work in particular and some personal items. But I DO try to keep it all out there as much as I can to make it interesting. I hope you enjoy reading the links to his page and his story. I haven't done much in the past 3 weeks because I've had the flu the whole time! Right through my birthday and Thanksgiving. Bummer. But it has given me renewed drive to advance the world of medical science. Ask me about doctors and medicine and I'll say the same thing. "Darn 20th century medicine! We're dealing with bear skins and stone knives!" I really think we're so unadvanced no matter what they say about how many advances have happened. We're reaching a point where new and fatal viruses happen more often. We need the kind of technology that I've been talking about for so long. So I intend to work harder and devote more time to advancing this science. I realize that there could be a potential pandemic with the bird flu that could happen and millions could be effected. I have to at least TRY to do what I can. So that's about it for now, I'll "keep you posted". The General Public Has Spoken! See? We live in this democracy and occasionally, it works. Here, I hadn't thought that anyone at all is reading this stuff, but lo and behold, after just a month of posting more favorable entries here, the readership has shot up! We went from an all time low of only 1350 visits in the whole month of September to a more respectable 1618 vists in October! We haven't had that many since April! So we heard you and responded. Maybe there's a little bit of our lives in everyone and when we find the similarities, we can learn more from each other. So... in order to have better input about this web site, I'm doing something I thought I'd never do. Create an email page. I wanted to find out what's going on in the minds of my readers and maybe make this a better site. So please feel free to email me and I'll try to get to your emails and respond as soon as I possibly can. Please no flaming or harsh words, I'm open to all suggestions, but there's always a good and constructive way to put it. Just click on the email page link and a separate page will pop up that you can write me a note on. You can put down your email address for a response, or just your name, or leave it anonymous. Thanks and I hope to keep up with all this! The normal report is that things are BUSY in my life. Many little projects clog the drain like hair in the bath tub from your roommate the Wookie. But I'm slowly chopping through it all and hope to see daylight at the end of this month. The holidays are coming up and so are many birthdays. (Mine included - this month!) So there's a lot to do. We're having both a Thanksgiving and Christmas get together over my place for the relatives and I can tell it'll be a big deal. I hope some people are getting good info from the "Experimenter's Corner" I put on last month. I hope to provide more projects so there'll be less stress in the world! Well, I'm sure I'll write again before the holidays, but all of you have a great Thanksgiving and please remember to call up an old relative you haven't talked to in a while and share a story. Maybe invite them over for dinner. It's the holidays, and that's always a time for family, friendship and healing. Bye for now. We're back! Well, after a long hiatus and much soul searching, the writings here finally get back to normal. In my last entry, I had spoken about how people don't really care about blogs. Guess what? I was terribly wrong. In March, we had a record number of 1756 visits! But then with each month, the number declined. 1610, 1454, 1290 and so on. So I've realized that it's important to post my thoughts and on goings even at the risk of my privacy. For a very long time, I've wanted to do some good for as many people as I can. I know my own directions have been to invent things that could help people in an engineering or scientific way. But now I realize that not only is that slow going, but I can also effect positive change through writing. So I'm now posting important and interesting things that I've learned and found out. I spoke before about people learning to live and let live. And how it seems like so many people are out for themselves. Everyone else would be pushed aside for their own plans and any resistance or opposition they meet would be countered with brute force or sharp, revengeful actions. There will always be people like that out there, and I feel bad that they may still feel like forfieting the good feelings of working peacefully with others, understanding their differences in harmony. I believe this is the true way to resolve issues and find a happy life. But there are also those who create great beauty, love, peace, and positive experiences. What if we all could be like that? I have been unusually blessed to have Cees in my life. I know I've read people write that kind of thing before and felt maybe they just have a lower expectation in life and when something ordinarily good comes along, they feel like they've gotten bread when they're starving. But the truth is, I'm a person with high expectations. And Cees has done an unusually fantastic job of meeting or exceeding them. No one is some kind of super human. We all make mistakes and can't be mind readers and fit perfectly with anyone. Some people might disagree with me, but I think every good relationship is one step off of ideal. If I had to live with someone exactly like me, I'd go nuts! Ha! I think being with someone who isn't just like you teaches you things. Often, I can be the voice of doom. "This could happen. Or that could happen" and I guess I prepare for the worst and hope for the best. But Cees tells me things like "There's nothing that we can't face together." Or "Everything's going to be ok." And although something life crushing can happen, I know that even if she can't handle things perfectly, her heart is strong and can carry us through it. Her intentions are not only good, but she backs them up as best as she can. That's all a man can ask of a woman. I know I'm soap boxing about her, but this IS about my thoughts and how my life progresses. Some times we are attracted to listening to find connection to our lives or find answers we are looking for and hope to find in someone else's experiences. I hope I can help some out there in that way. So here's today's life's lesson. When I used to think of finding the perfect mate, I used to think of finding someone outgoing, cultured, opinionated, but close to my opinions, someone with looks enough to impress my friends and family, and possibly even with a career that might do the same. Maybe even a doctor who might help me with my medical research. But I've learned that all your friends and family are not going to live with you every day and night. And that looks or money or prestigue is just the marshmellow in the hot chocolate. But without the hot chocolate, there's nothing to really warm you. I wish I had learned earlier to be looking for someone more quiet than me. Someone who possessed the desire to make a family work yet wasn't homely because of it. Meaning, I had met people who said all they wanted to do was have a family and home, but that was because that's all they thought they could accomplish. You need someone with self-esteme and humility, yet reasonable intelligence or charm as a substitution. So that's what I've learned. That the only person you need to impress is yourself, and that balance is hard to find in someone. Find ordinary balance and don't expect someone to be extraordinary, just extraordinarily good for you. So I'll be writing more often and posting more info on my life, experiments and so on. I've also switched the format here. I had put the journal in chronilogical order. January, February, March and so forth. But I've changed it now to be most recent first. So you'll know what's going on more easily. I've also started an "Experimenter's Corner" where I'll be posting some of my projects. This will be under my "Research" section under "My Own Projects". A section that was previously ignored all too much. So I hope some of my projects will help others get better solutions to some simple and not so simple questions. Look for it here. Thanks again for hanging in there and I'll write again soon this time. I know, three months and you don't even hear a peep from me. I'm sorry to say I'm about to give up on writing my journal. It's not that I would want to stop writing random ideas here, but I know how internet blogs go. The two main complains are: 1.) No one cares about your life when theirs is going on. Blogs can get boring. 2.) Too many people take things in the wrong light and blame you. I'll elaborate on #2. As my previous post said, I'm starting to see the distortion of fair play in life. People don't forgive or live and let live. Others are greedy and go out for what they can get. Maybe I live in an area where people have brought this to an art form, but it dismays me. So I've decided to become more of a recluse. I would enjoy sharing my thoughts and daily life with anyone who would care to log on and look, but I've never gotten an email back or even a comment about it, so maybe no one's reading it. Maybe the only people reading this journal are those who care more about the content of it if it has something on them than what's happening in life. So, unless I hear from others, I'm going to discontinue my entries here. If I go on a trip or win the lottery or cure cancer, I'll post it. But no sense writing to a wall if the wall doesn't talk back. I appreciate anyone who stops by and reads for a moment. I've tried to entertain and amuse. But for now, at this time, I'm going to sign off and say good bye. I have great plans coming up in the near future. So hopefully if I beat the placidity and complacent and apathy gremlins, I'll achieve my final goals in life. To do good and help others and make a vast difference in life. When that happens, I'll write again. But until that time, stay well, read, experience life, travel when you can, be nice to others and be happy! So far, I’ve tried to make this journal nothing but little blurbs about what I’m doing physically from day to day. But recently I realized that some of the most important things are not what we’ve accomplished, but what we’ve learned. I’ve been pondering life lately. It seems as if more and more that people are becoming uptight. I remember a time when it wasn’t uncommon to think of others and help them, or put them first. I saw that in my own behavior and I saw it return to me as well. Now it seems like everyone’s out for themselves. Oh, this isn’t a behavior that exists in every situation, but it’s becoming alarmingly more popular. People want revenge more, fight more, claw for more space, more recognition. They can’t afford the American dream (a house) any more so they live in contempt in their apartments. Celebrity wife killers go free while someone who sends spam gets 9 years in prison. People want to put tracking devices on all sorts of criminals, but they don’t see that it’s just the first step in giving up some of their own civil rights. We were once a nation of philosophers and idealists. Now our lofty visions have fallen for the sake of competition and supremacy. I had a conversation with someone in the waiting room while I was at a doctor’s visit. (medical, not mental, if you were wondering) I mentioned how I was thinking of moving because I hear about a shooting almost every day on the local news. She said “Well, isn’t there crime everywhere?” I guess that’s what people say to console themselves (this person also told me they have two houses) to stay in this area. But would you rather live in New York City or Hawaii? Crime’s everywhere, but that doesn’t mean I have to live in a worsening area. Everyday I see more and more people unaware how they are darkening the landscape of humanity. Losing sight of honest answers and good causes. Staying in their own little cubicles and hoping the elected officials will make the right decisions for them. Complacency is the cancer of life. It used to be we’d check things out for ourselves. Now we’re too busy not taking our vacation time to do that. I’m not sure what the answer is, but I do know that there needs to be a change. We need to be a more caring, more forgiving, more intelligent people. Not curing a problem with a sledgehammer, but with insight and experience. Change has to happen. A positive one for humanity’s sake. As I try to understand these needs, I will post my thoughts here and hopefully they may act as seeds for those to think about. Until next time, I regret to say that I've had a death in the family. My brother-in-law Josh, had a sudden and fatal heart attack this past Tuesday (3/8/05). He was only 33 and his wife was is 24. He had a lot of arterial sclerosis compounded with hypertension. It was a shock to us all because not only was he so young, but also so full of life. He was one of the most personable and kind people I've ever met. He always had a smile and a positive attitude and a world of patience. He effected many people's lives and I think there was about 150 to 200 people at his viewing, service, and burial this past Friday and Saturday. We all feel for and sympathize with his wife and family who are going through a hard time. I knew Josh well and I'm saddened to not have known him better. Even though he gave me the impression that he looked to me for advice, he always gave me inspiration to do better as well. I know he's in a better place now "having a cup of coffee with St. Paul" as his sister-in-law would say. We'll all miss him. Godspeed Joshua, you were a prince among men. I almost let January go by without a comment, but this one's really important. It’s about forgiveness. So I hope you’ll all bare with me as I make a special journal entry about something that happened recently to me that we all should think about. The other day, an old girlfriend wrote to me and requested I take a reference to her off my web site. The reference would have shown that she was seeing two people at the same time, and I was once of the people she was seeing who hurt from that experience. She still was with the other person and wanted to keep her past secret. For reasons you can imagine, I rolled my eyes at how someone who scorned me was still thinking only of herself and protecting her piety. I was also angry that she invaded my life by reading my web site. She really voted herself way out of my life long ago by her actions and I hope she never returns. So to ask a favor of me, especially one so petty seemed so incredibly California self-centered. A few days later, someone I know acted very vain and I made mention of it. The truth wasn't something easily digestible for that person and they reacted. I wasn't prone to care if someone didn't like hearing my opinion. It was, after all truthful and I was tired of hearing a "me, me, me" set of stories from that person. As things would have it, someone very close to me at the same time was in the hospital with a life threatening operation. I know I was very caught up in the moment and not being as patient as I usually am. Life is so precious. And I know that most people who do something wrong or feign attention for self gratification, or dig the last drop of human kindness out of someone are doing so usually out of fear. I fell for those people as they are usually types who aren't as versed at giving themselves enough credit or taking a risk to be human and vulnerable. So I forgave both those people and removed one person's reference from my web site and sent my wish to the other person that I hope we get along more in the future. Forgiveness is something we all need to cultivate more often. None of us are perfect or always do the right thing. Some times we all make mistakes we're sorry for and hope that others can forgive our trespasses as well as we forgive those who trespass against us. We all need a cleansing of the soul and should find the will to forgive and forget and live in peace. Until next time, |